out of the undertow

favorite things about myself

no matter how drunk I am before I go to bed, I ALWAYS FLOSS.

let the wild rumpus start.

goodbye, maurice sendak.

two moons & a new place to live.

this picture is from a few months ago, but it makes me feel hopeful.

So. I have been meaning to write more, to explore more, to put things down on paper. Ya know. The general thing that happens sometimes when you’ve finished your thesii and have been so busy playing and arranging other people’s words…that you miss jotting down your own. This is a place where I can do this…and also carry on reblogging all the goodness that is kittens soft as sweaters and kittens hugging lizards and Chuck Bass wearin’ dem glasses.

A lot of changes are happening now. I will be graduating in two weeks. I have been engulfed in higher ed for SEVEN YEARS (with a brief 2 year stint in Boston/Oil City/Southeast Asia in between undergrad/grad). I have forgotten what it is like to not have a schedule that revolves around classes and rehearsals and on call trips to the hospital and hearing all the crazy things that happen in dormitories and cockroaches falling from your ceiling. I’ve been telling myself that it’s fine it’s fine just a few more weeks.

I will be moving into an apartment in Williamsburg with a train that rumbles on the other side of the kitchen windows. I will be moving in with Nolan, after almost two years of the damn Metro North, all these phone calls, all these nights in my dorm room, laptop propped on rubbermaid bins watching Toddlers & Tiaras and Top Chef, drinking $5 Andre and settling on an appropriate temperature for the shower. Any boy who loves you through all the shenanigans that is known as grad school is a keeper. A real-life-super-keeper. There’s a multitude of love in my heart for this gem.

We’ll be living with Julianna and Jit. I’m beyond excited. I love living with people. I have felt very alone these last three years living on campus and I can’t wait to make dinners together, watch movies, drink sangria, sing songs (Juls and Jit sing more songs that most anyone I know), and talk theatre, talk food, watch videos of giant dogs and tigers and always always always make time for frozen yogurt (or other sweet treats).

Julianna is my girl. I don’t know who I’d be without her. To have someone to be honest with in a grad program is just beyond lucky. I’d be lost. I’d be mad. I’d be a fuming ball of flames without all of our chats, our yoga-ing (..and oh, how we’re gonna miss Freddie and Pheobe at YogaWorks in Irvington), our smoothie makin’, all of it. How thrilled am I to LIVE WITH THIS GIRL? Beyond it. We’re gonna make some goddamn theatrical masterpieces and you’re gonna like it.

There’s a lot going on in my head these days. I’m in a limbo-zone, a space between the shelf and the wall where all your earrings fall.

I’m ready. Graduation still seems like a far-off entity and it surely hasn’t hit me yet, but I’m about to start my life in New York with people that I love and join the people that I’ve been missing who are already there, making amazing things, being their wonderful selves.

I got a haircut. I’ve been having a kale smoothie for one meal a day. I’m getting rid of some clothes and hoping to get a job so I can just refresh everything. (Seriously…I’m still wearing things from high school…)

I’m almost done reading Murakami’s 1Q84.In that world, there are two moons. I’m in that world now, it seems. One moon over Bronxville and all this schooling…and one moon over that apartment with no furniture (yet) in Williamsburg…where Nolan’s been sleeping in a huddle of blankets on the floor.

I can’t wait to get there.

I can’t wait to be.